@tarashoe: this month's full moon is in virgo. you know what that means: you shouldn't be friends with me because i will tell you shit like this
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ibid78: My desires are unconfessional. No wait. Unconditional? Pumpkin sensual? I just had it. Undone sectionals? Unmoustachable? Stunned pistachio?
@superdadatron: *Opens fridge *Sees chocolate bar with a note "please don't eat me". *Eats chocolate bar Now who would want to eat a piece of paper?
@1InTheStinker: The cops came to my house claiming my dog chased someone down on a bike! I explained to the idiots that my dog doesn't own a bike.
@AdamOfEarth: Iron Man, Iron Man, does everything an Iron can Gets real hot on a mat, makes your clothes get really flat Look out! Here comes the Iron Man