@SirEviscerate: This old rich guy pointed to a jungle and said I had 20 minutes before he started hunting me. He seems pretty mad that I'm just standing here tweeting.
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@markleggett: Whenever a woman tells me that she just wants to have a good time and sleep with me, I say "You can only pick one."
@Mindless4Miles: I just want to be rich enough one day to name my kid after an Australian mammal or something found in my spice rack.