@beingtheo: This Petraeus scandal is getting real confusing. I hope I didn't sleep with him.
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@EJGomez: me: annie are you ok so annie are you ok are you ok annie (X5) girl [wearing name tag that says annie]: sir will it be paper or plastic
@hazelmotes1: Alien: take me to your leader. Me: They all suck. How about I take you to this place I know where you can get amazing mini donuts?
@Fred_Delicious: Mark Zuckerberg came up with the idea for Facebook when he was at a party & a racist uncle wrote a bible quote on a painting then poked him