@vexroid: This restaurant should really be giving me a discount for ordering carryout and not bringing my kids inside.
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@mellimelle: Find a penny, pick it up. All day long you'll wtf, that thing is filthy. Wash your hands immediately.
@moose_chocolate: I, put commas, in, weird places, so that, you, read, my tweets, like William, Shatner.
@jimmytorosian: Throw stones at people who live in glass houses. They won't throw them back because they've been told their whole life that they shouldn't.