@DanHopp: This sounds bad:
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@JohnLyonTweets: Shout-out to smartphones for eliminating tedious tasks from our lives like reading books or watching the road when we drive.
@okaypup: "Do not purchase if seal is broke" *looks over at homeless seal* *places canned pickles back on the shelf*
@StatusInBeirut: If you think being a vegetarian will make you thin, I direct your attention to cows.