@PanettaSexyTime: This spider just got away from me because I made the classic villain mistake of telling him my whole evil plan before killing him.
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@EJGomez: God: ok u can make one human that's it Satan: how do u feel about toupees & the name Donald
@DontTouchMyWine: Whoa. Wait a minute. So those stick figures on your car aren’t for pedestrians you ran over? Damn it! *starts scraping off her stickers*
@Adam14: I heard that sadomasochistic vegans like to get beet and artichoked. Some even like getting pead on. Don't turnip your nose at this.
@BradBroaddus: I just got booed off stage by a bunch of jerks that didn't appreciate my humor. That's the last time I'll do a eulogy.