@meganamram: This Venn guy was sure bad at drawing circles next to each other
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@stuckinaportal: [mastercard commercial] "there are some things that money can't buy" politician: i don't get it
@caliluvgirl77: Just made eye contact with my hot neighbor through the window Wish I didn't have 6 marshmallows in my mouth.
@LipstickSpice: I'm getting married! Well, I have a new boyfriend! Okay, I have a date for tomorrow night! FINE. Shoe salesman said "Come back soon".