@girlwithatail: This woman's "I'm deleting my Facebook" post has 52 comments and she's replied to all of them. Not a strong start.
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@TrainedHedonist: What religious people say: "I have you in my prayers." What non-religious people hear: "I'm trying to raise Aquaman on this cat radio."
@Dirty_Naomi: I sleep with a knife under my bed in case I can't open my midnight snacks. It also comes in handy if people try to steal them.
@RexRizzo: Wired: "Machine learning will TAKE OVER THE WORLD!" Amazon: "We see you bought a wallet. Would you like to buy ANOTHER WALLET?"
@LurkAtHomeMom: Hell hath no fury like a 4 year old whose sandwich has been cut into squares when he wanted triangles.