@sgrstk: This Xmas, remember there are people less fortunate than you. People who can't sleep diagonal, people sharing a bed, people who are married.
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@MarkAFuqua_Hunt: You say you're an atheist, yet you tell people they can "go to hell!" Make up your mind already.
@KrazykurtKurt: ME: "I don't want sex tonight" GIRLFRIEND: "ok" Reverse phycology doesn't work on women.
@djdarrellripley: Me: Let's get married secretly, and not tell anybody! Her: Yea, but what if we have a baby? Me: Well, we'll tell the baby...