@ExtraGrumpyCat: This year I'm going to put the mistletoe in my back pocket, so people I hate can kiss my ass.
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@wife_housy: My son recovered from his illness while I was filling out all the paperwork in the waiting room.
@BlindChow: [mailman delivering package to hospital] DOCTOR: ah, just what the doctor ordered MAILMAN: please stop saying that
@BeagirlNJ: Top 5 things to ditch in 2017 5. Debt 4. People you don't like 3. Facebook 2. Drama 1. The bodies
@torrami: Ladies: The "silent treatment" is not a punishment. Try the "sit next to him and cry and or frown excessively treatment" instead.