@sixfootcandy: Those Weren’t Raisinets: A Mouse Tale
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@Shock_Monster: Why do Asian people never seem to age? I met a chinese girl today & I estimate her age to be somewhere between 4 & 197.
@str8outaCompUSA: Jesus, don't take the wheel. Give me your keys. Sober up. *hands cup of water* DON'T TURN THAT INTO WINE AGAIN
@ladybroseph: *A burlap bag is pulled off your head, a bright spotlight is causing you to blink* WHERE DOES THE ARCHIVED MICROSOFT OUTLOOK EMAIL GO.
@OtherDanOBrien: [a 2nd grade classroom 5 yrs from now] TEACHER: Khaleesi M, please leave Khaleesi S alone. Khaleesi T, I still need your permission slip