@timdonakowski: Thousands of married racists are waking up this morning and questioning the skin color of their spouse.
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@bea_ker: Donald Trump's campaign is basically that thing where you say the wrong answer in Pictionary then just keep saying it louder and louder
@Gre_Gone: *clicks on hotel tv's Adult Zone* "Oh hell yeah." *it's just a bunch of people paying bills and doing yard work* "...Oh hell yeah."
@justinbieber: Call me maybe by Carly Rae Jepson is possibly the catchiest song I've ever heard lol
@robin_991: Dishwasher broke, so now I’m washing them all by hand like some sort of motherless Disney Princess.