@JimCarrey: Time 4 the 3rd debate, the political eqivalent of driving past a street corner several times to make sure u choose the least skanky ho! ;^)
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@oakhillbargrill: Son: I'm addicted to morphing Dad: Oh God no, are you smoking it, injecting it? Son: No Dad,not Morphine Dad: what? Son: *turns into bat
@bridger_w: When I'm worried about something, I find that going on a walk is a great way to get outside, breathe, and think of new things to worry about
@iamopeimu: My Ex works in a pharmacy,so whenever i want to spoil her mood I wil just go there and buy condom for no reason sometimes i go 3 times a day
@Scimommy: 90% of parenting older kids is making sure they're not in the same room when they have to do homework.