@TheTweetParrot: Time flies when you throw your alarm clock out the window.
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@MarcusTheToken: St. Patrick's Day is the day we all watch Ghost and Dirty Dancing in honor of Patrick Swayze.
@cheeky__gal: I think the lady at the movies is "shushing" me, but I can't tell because I'm eating Doritos.
@BestScienceJoke: Some cardinals and some ordinals walked into a bar, but the ordinals walked in first.