@VancityReynolds: Tinder isn't a babysitting app. Apologies to Crystal and Janine for the misunderstanding.
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@jonnysun: spider-man, spidre-man,. does watever a spider can: has two legs., he can talk. wat kind of spider bit this guy
@Slims_Ramblings: Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Because I didn't see you first.
@Book_Krazy: Me: Do you have any dreams? Him:...I'm running on a giant hamster wheel and a squirrel wearing a tuxedo comes... Me: ASPIRATIONS YOU IDIOT
@TheTweetOfGod: The odds of Jesus coming a second time are about the same as those of ANY man coming a second time. #amirightladies