@BillCorbett: To celebrate Independence Day I'm finding Englishmen and then walking angrily away from them!
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@Dmvm1977: When I get home to find my wife naked in the tub, seductively asking me to "warm her up", I dont waste a second.. to throw in a hairdryer
@DanMentos: Dear Sir, I am writing this with a heavy heart. Sorry it's so hard to read I should really find a pen
@KevinFarzad: Fellas, here's a flirting tip: If a girl plays with her hair while taking to you, it means she has lice and you should stay away from her.
@SaddestFinger: My grandfather told me that during the war he was exposed to irritants like pepper spray and mustard gas. Now he's a seasoned vet.