@vexroid: To everyone who ever doubted me, all I have to say to you is...lucky guess.
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@dysalexia: Next time you're on a date and someone asks "Is that your boyfriend or your brother?" smile really creepy and whisper "Both".
@nedostup: Every woman says she wants to be treated like a princess, until you try to marry her off to your most powerful ally.
@alfageeek: Fun fact: if you say “I did the math,” nobody argues with you because they don't want to have to redo the math themselves.
@shashaintl: I just owned you for three seconds. Possibly five if you're a slow reader. Up to ten if you read this again.