@peachesanscream: To find out your cat name, pick any name at random and refuse to answer to it.
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@SortaBad: *Spends 30 min practicing Starbucks order in mirror* *Feels confident* *"Hi I'd like a grander ahoy Ralph Macchioatto lateenbay"* *dammit*
@KatieBurnett: Never seen anyone in Nandos or McDonald's pick up an appropriate amount of napkins - you're cleaning up after a burger not a double homicide
@HeatherLuvsYou: I always check my smoke alarms to make sure they're working. I call it "cooking"