@KateWhineHall: To make up for all the junk I ate over the weekend, I plan to run 86 miles today.
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@jordan_stratton: Oh, man. My grandma caught me texting my OTHER grandma and now things are super tense.
@aveuaskew: If you speak like Fat Albert throughout the entire exam, doctors will prescribe whatever you want.
@juliussharpe: If you just got invited to do something on New Year's Eve, it means someone else cancelled.