@VodkaThursday: To punish me, my 2yr old shuts herself in her room. She can shut, but not open, doors. She ends up trapped in a self-imposed timeout. #irony
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@vineyille: Me: Just a glass of water Scientist waiter: You mean a glass of... yourself? You see, the body is made up of ok ok sit down I'll bring it
@my_minivan_life: Just told my two kids that I love them both equally and the one with his shoes on the wrong feet totally bought it.