@jtrulez: To successfully fight a bear, strike it firmly in the sternum with an open palm. Congratulations. You are now fighting a bear.
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@dave_cactus: God grant me the FOOD to sustain my body, the LAUNDRY DETERGENT to wash the stains from my clothes, and the WISDOM to know the difference.
@hippieswordfish: ME: help someone caught my wife in a big net 911: where M: between 2 trees in our yard 911:a hammock? M: idk what his name is just send help
@sass_n_ass: No thanks, Winter Olympics. If I wanted to see a bunch of white people playing in the snow, I'd hop on over to Facebook.