@Moemontes: To the dude i just saw driving a beat up Ford mini van with spare tire and dream catcher on mirror: that dream catchers not working dude!
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@cornlog: So rude of Ashton Kutcher to file divorce papers right before Demi Moore's 150th birthday.
@brennadine: Pavlov's bell, but it's me reading an email that I think says winebar when it's actually webinar.
@ImKevinito: Wifey is pregnant again. She wants a girl but I want a black guy so I have someone to play basketball with.