@Phoebetate: To the squirrel carrying the mushroom up a tree to his nest: you may want to eat that with your feet firmly on the ground, buddy.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@ArchiePeeler: If anyone pulls a quarter from behind your ear you chloroform them and put them in chains in your basement and you'll always have quarters.
@aveuaskew: If all the Domino's employees in the world held hands, you'd have to make your own pizza.
@illiter8too: Murder is justifiable if it's against a person who calls you and hands their phone off to another person with whom you didn't wish to speak.
@blairgarner: To apply for a job at Hooters do they hand you a bra and say, "Here, just fill this out." ?