@ohheyohhihello: Today I drove through a huge puddle that splashed up under my car and laughed to myself as I whispered, "car bidet."
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@djdarrellripley: I created a new solvent that will dissolve ANYTHING in the world! (Sigh) I just don't know what to keep it in....
@dru0887: No, LinkedIn. I would not like to link my Twitter account but thank you for trying to get me unemployed for life.