@causticbob: Today. I. Realized. That. Typing. Like. This. Doesn't. Make. Your. Point. Stronger. It. Makes. You. Look. Like. Your. Computer. Has. Asthma
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@KoKeniSasquatch: You know America you kinda brought Bieber on yourselves. There's not enough Canadians to make him go viral. Sorry but thems the truth.
@GrantTanaka: On your deathbed tell everyone "pray for me" then make sure to leave a note to be opened after you die that says "pray harder next time"
@DeanScott01: Ladies, if a man says he will fix it, he will. There's no need to remind him every six months about it.
@Iwriteforcats: Pharmacies could save a lot of hassle and just have customers walk through a denim detector to see if they're cooking meth.