@OhNoSheTwitnt: Today is apparently Ash Wednesday which I can only assume has something to do with our hero from the hit TV show Pokémon.
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@ImaFlyontheWall: Me: So you're an Atheist? Him: Yup! Me: So what year is it? Him: 2015 Me: based on how years are counted after a certain birth?
@notbedelia: When your wife says she needs a new broom it's best not to ask if she broke the last one in a crash landing.
@Vj_Phresh: I'm so broke right now, if my gf leaves me for a richer person I'm going with them -__-
@michaelianblack: Common courtesy: don't bring McDonalds French fries on the plane unless you bring enough for everybody.