@cambuslad: Today Mother phoned asked me what I was doing . I said I was on Google maps and looking at her house .She asked if I could see her waving .
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@JohnLyonTweets: I'm scared to open any email with a photo attachment because of all this talk about photobombing.
@AmberTozer: If I'm ever being chased by a giraffe I'm gonna run into a place with low ceiling fans sorry giraffe but I gotta do what's best for me
@iQuoteComedy: Girl: "Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" Guy: "Both, now get in the van."
@NyAdas: Today I learned the hard way if you over-pluck your eyebrows everyone thinks you're interested in what they are saying