@AimeeHelene1: Today there was a band-aid on my plate, a bat flew in the house, & a bee stung me. Today was brought to me by the letter B.
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@SashaBrenner: One of the wheelchair basketball team players has been tested positive for WD40 :(
@sofarrsogud: ME: Thanks for all you did man. It's because of people like you, we have our freedom. HIM: Again, I'm a veterinarian.
@WeissBrandon: Relax white people, black people have the "N" word. But we still have words like "Yacht", and sayings like "thanks for the warning officer".
@jwoodham: Reports are indicating that Ivanka Trump may take on some roles of the First Lady. Still no word on who will handle the duties of President.