@Brampersandon_: Today's episode of Wheel of Fortune has been cancelled because Jesus took the wheel.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@SteveSuckington: Me: omg can smoking weed make u hallucinate? Dog making pancakes: lol that wasn't weed dude
@SCbchbum: Thanks for warning me to be careful after I slipped & fell. I'll be sure to wish you luck on your lab test results at your funeral.
@FeelingMervis: Find someone who can make you happy, like a doctor or pharmacist....basically anyone who has access to mood-enhancing drugs.
@rsynder336x2: I always pick up a huge cucumber up at walmart and yell to my wife "you said you wanted the biggest one right" Because I'm a great husband