@julie2288: Toddlers are the only life form that can exist entirely on their own snot, one goldfish cracker, and half a chicken nugget a day.
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@ThisOneSayz: Unless you have stellar reflexes, throwing a bouncy ball at your spouse during an argument is not the best choice.
@QwertyJones3: A girl called me "sir" today and I was so angry I took off my suit of armor and stormed out of Medieval Times.
@bourgeoisalien: Them: If you were stranded on a desert island with any two people, living or dead, who would they be? Me: Can they both be dead?
@tastefactory: When parents say to kids "go to ur room & think about what you've done" it's really good practice for what you'll do every night as an adult