@leifromloihi: told my kid to sign my boyfriend's birthday card
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@MavenofHonor: When I use my grandmother's cast iron skillet I feel close to her. Even though she's way, way up there repairing the space station
@Vodkantots: [to other patients in psychiatrist's waiting room] I'm not like you people. This is court mandated.
@jazmasta: [kids party] "This bouncy castle is twice the price of last year" Dad no "That's.." Please no dad "..Inflation for you" *kids start crying*