@primawesome: Tommy Lee Jones always looks like his son just told him he wants to ride unicycles professionally.
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@Robbie_Cakes: Why do people always look so embarrassed walking down the street with a pizza box? Be proud man, you've got a pizza!
@SuperRandomish: When someone asks how I feel, I always answer "Squishy and like I've done something wrong"
@BuckyIsotope: Barbie's head is in the refrigerator. Ken swears a "giant child" did it. The police shrug and slap handcuffs on Ken and lead him away.