@NYC_Blonde: Tomorrow is the 4th of July which means one thing, it's going to be a really big day for nail art Instagram photos.
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@TheAlexNevil: Shoulder Devil: So I say "Go on--do it!" And the moron does it! Shoulder Angel: What an idiot! Me: You guys know I can hear you, right?
@TheOnlyMANiC: Imagine Putting £5 worth of fuel in your car and your cars like "well, since we're both being childish" And refuses to open the door.
@QwertyJones3: Her: It's disgusting how many dirty habits you have. Me: THE NUNS PAY ME GOOD MONEY TO DO THIER LAUNDRY OK???
@Vodkantots: My neighbor with the Confederate flag is harmless after all. He just drove off in the cutest little ghost costume.