@SortaBad: tonight at the bar, ask a woman if you can buy her a drink. If she says yes, hand that lucky lady a Starbucks gift card and walk away
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@ClichedOut: Her: HELP I'M ON FIRE!! ME: *slow drag on cigarette* Technically, the fire is on you.
@LackOfShame: Her: Let's just drop it. Me: Fine. Her: Me: Her: I just find it funny how... Me: *opens car door and shoulder rolls out into traffic*
@thetobbie: One of the worst things about being deaf has to be the inability to tell whether people are yawning or screaming...