@longwall26: Tonight, people who are weaker, slower, and dumber than you will deliver bags of treats to your very doorstep. Seize this moment.
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@birbigs: New slogan for cats: "Ever go to the zoo and want to snuggle a tiger but don't want to die? Cats."
@TheBoydP: Fact: A good beer will not lose its label after sitting in a cooler of ice water all week. Related: Why is there still beer in the cooler??
@SaraMansford: Dear karma: perhaps we could be partners? You're doing great work, but I've identified a bunch of people you've overlooked.