@slimmy_shady: *too embarrassed to buy condoms**buys 3D printer**makes gun**robs condom factory*
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@JennyJohnsonHi5: I'm working on a screenplay called '127 Seconds' about my fat co-worker getting his hand stuck in a Pringles tube.
@DanMentos: "How can I help you? Hi I'd like a root canal "Are you a patient here?" No "Who referred you to us?" No one "Ok then why-" I have a Groupon
@RealDMK: Buy followers? No thanks. I'm married so I spend enough money on people I don't talk to