@Brianhopecomedy: Took my 3 year old to a lot of historic sites and whale watching today. Asked what her favourite part was and she said, "The M&M's".
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@SteveKoehler22: When you ask her "Have you ever read Shakespeare?" And she answers "No, who wrote it?" .... Keep moving.
@GrantTanaka: coworker: [talking about having children] me: aww man I can't have children coworker: why me: because I hate them
@Brianhopecomedy: I have keys on my keychain from the houses I used to live in just in case I'm hungry and in the area.