@OhHiAlyPie: Took my 3rd self-defense class, so if anyone feels like attacking me straight on, very slowly, w/ a fake knife in their right hand, BRING IT
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@QwertyJones3: HILLARY CLINTON: Putin wants a puppet as the US president KERMIT THE FROG: YAAAYYYYYYYYY!!!
@Book_Krazy: Couple: [hands me camera] Do you mind taking a picture? "Sure"[click] Couple: How does it look? "I just got my hair done, so pretty good"
@Jake_Vig: Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Just think, there are people out there who don't get to read my tweets.
@MaraWritesStuff: BROTHER: The Godfather is on? That's not very Thanksgiving-y. ME: Well, it's about family...