@fakegoldegg: toothpaste is a big scam. if ur tooth falls out, it stays out. toothpaste Will Not paste it back in.
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@KevinFarzad: Before college I didn't have a degree, or money, or any idea what I was doing with my life. But NOW I have a degree.
@Papa_Mex: Big shoutout to my neighbors, who left their back door open accidentally, when I needed a few things and didn't want to go to the store...
@aveuaskew: Liven up any boring conversation by telling people you have a glass eye and then watch them try and figure out which one it is.