@McNevich: Total shocker that you actually have to pay for things when you get to the register. Go ahead and dump your purse on the counter. We'll wait
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@Rollinintheseat: My life is a constant battle of wanting to pet a dog and not wanting to talk to its owner.
@CraigChamberlin: Good marriage requires communication: My wife tells me I'm wrong, and I tell her she's right.
@bridger_w: "Ah, OK. Yes. Now I see it." -Me lying to someone who's pointing out a constellation