@Ooft_Headshot: Toy Story has resulted in me not being able to throw away my childhood toys in case they get depressed and want to kill themselves.
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@UnFitz: I've been towing this guy around by a rope for years. When is he going to learn to do this by himself? - dogs, maybe
@LMLMadness: Show her how romantic you are by sprinkling body parts in a trail leading to the bed.
@1followernodad: guys: women are a mystery. women: Here is what we- guys: LITERALLY WHAT DO THEY WANT? women: well for start- guys: Guess we'll never know!
@WilliamAder: If it wasn't for the 140 character limit, I'd be on Chapter 27 of my first tweet right now.