@TheTweetOfGod: Traditional marriage was between a boy's parents and a girl's parents. And maybe some cattle.
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@Michael1979: Therapist: Your relationships fail due to your selfishness *I slip him a twenty* T: They fail because you're great & everyone else is awful
@iAmDelFreaky: 2: Where mommy? Me: Mommy's at a meeting. 2: Mommy is meat? Me: No. Well...yes, but only if we ever get stranded on an island. 2: Ok.
@jordan_stratton: Whelp. It's December. That time of year when I have zero excuse for being so sweaty.
@BeardSpice: My high school bully just made my McDouble, so I guess I won; but then again I am eating at McDonald's so I guess it's a tie.