@LaetPO: Tragic News: Plane carrying Donald Trump underwent massive turbulence, lost engine power, stalled, but landed safely.
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@MarkAFuqua_Hunt: I'll always be here for you.... Unless we run out of beer, and someone has some over there. Then I'll be over there for you.
@0hJuliette: Whenever a girl is talking too much, remind yourself that other thing she does with her mouth that you like so much. Might dull the pain ;)
@LoveNLunchmeat: If a tiger goes to bite you, confuse him by french kissing him. You'll probably still die, but at least you got to make out w/ a tiger.
@P0tterhead_394: I like when babies cry and you make the same noise as them, and they look at you like, "Wow. That's annoying." and you're like, "I know."