@CallMeDraper: Treadmills should just have one big button that says "Make Me Look Good Naked."
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@trevso_electric: Remember: tomorrow is TOPLESS TUESDAY no matter what human resources tells you.
@SteveSuckington: Her: "Add insult to injury why don't you" Me: "Your broken leg looks fat in that cast"
@IanDouglasTerry: Dude yelled "Fight me like a man" at me, so I held him down and marginalized him for a thousand years.