@thatUPSdude: Treat me like a semicolon and use me in all the wrong ways.
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@One_FineMess: A cig takes 7 minutes off your life A piece of bacon takes 9 minutes off your life According to my calculations I should have died in 1812
@frenchielaboozi: seems like you must have been preeeetty stupid to get caught for murder in the 1800s
@TwinSurvivalist: Dr: You're diabetic. Too much sugar and I'll have to amputate your legs. Me: *shoving Cinnabon in mouth* Can I get those cool blade ones?
@Bob_Janke: Believe it or not I'm listening to the Final Countdown in the grocery store. Now you're hearing it too.