@PORNOPINION: Tried to console my ex after losing her bf and all I could muster was, "there's plenty more married men out there."
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@jannable9: *Food arrives* *Waits 3 days* *Slowly takes bite of food* *Waitress appears from under the table in camouflage* HOW IS EVERYTHING??
@bigdumbbrad: I only put one eye on my snowman. That way, if it ever comes to life, the lack of depth perception will give me a tactical advantage.