@eric10F: Tried to pick a booger off my phone screen. Ended up calling my mom, signing up for AOL and getting an online degree in refrigerator repair
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@Tmoney68: I've seen people tear a phone book in half with their bare hands & I just had to use scissors to open a bagged salad.
@joejwest: DAD: Sorry it's not a pony, honey. Best I could do LITTLE GIRL: [riding gigantic earthworm] This is Princess Doomtube. She shall be feared
@Storminika: I like to take candy from a kid cause sugar is bad for them. Then, I eat it in front of them while saying, "don't do this"