@meganamram: Trump is a plant by the NRA to make liberals want to shoot someone
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@skadel68: Human Resources just came up with a cool new term for just about everything I like to do at work. They call it "inappropriate"
@thenatewolf: Go ahead, mate with someone who wears glasses, add to the degradation of our eyesight as a species. Not like there are bears we need to spot
@iGreenMonk: Some day when scientists discover the center of the universe, many people are going to be disappointed to find out it isn't them.
@BlindChow: I struggle against the ropes binding me, catching the scent of gas. "You'll die too," I say. "9 lives," my cat whispers, lighting a match.