@Mardigroan: Trump says he'll make Oasis pay for a wonder wall.
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@WilliamAder: Auto correct changed "group hug" to "grope hug" and I'm not in charge of the team-building exercises any more.
@ddsmidt: Throw me to the wolves and they'll come back with cute names, little sweaters & an affinity for baby talk.
@goodersuk74: I got a new stick of deoderant. Instructions said: 'remove cap & push up bottom'. I can barely walk but when I fart the room smells lovely