@rickygervais: Trump worked his way up from nothing. He's going to give every American the same 1 million dollars he started with. That's all you need.
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@Naked_Wombat: I'm not necessarily saying that I am or am not a super hero, but I do occasionally stand with my hands on my hips.
@rickolantern: They grow up so fast. My nephew lost his first tooth Saturday night In a fight a with a bouncer
@jngraphs: *Tweets funniest tweet ever *Dies laughing *Over 6 billion die laughing *Germany and Russia survive *Coz nobody left to explain the joke
@MDthrice: *on date* Me [don't let her know you're married] I have a wif..i hotspot on my phone. Her: oh that's cool. Me: yeah my wife got it for me.